Of pink sorrows and blue laughters
by Strangerr
Summary: /anthology/rating is not applied to every chapter/17.Of technology and Naruto/"Look teme, I really don't want a night of 'intimate passion' with you"/INCOMPLETE/
1. Of rainbow cats and revealing clothes

Summary: _"Sasuke-kun! I want a cat!"_

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Humor

* * *

_CAT__**S**_

"_Uwaah! Sasu-kun look the cat is sooo cute!!"_

_-squeals-_

"_Hn."_

_-punch-_

"_Constipated moron."_

"_Hn. Cute? Sakura it's __**orange."**_

"…_."_

"…_."_

"_COLORIST!!"_

_CAT__**S**_

"SASUKE-KUUUUUN!!"

"What!?" Sasuke said with a small tint of red in his cheeks,_ trying_ to stop his eyes from roaming.

'_Okay..uh..shit, stay cool! I'm an Uchiha, a mighty mighty Uchiha. I will not succumb to her."_

He chanted over and over in his head but his eyes accidentally landed on her exposed cleavage, darkening his blush.

Sakura is currently wearing an _itty bitty tank-top_ and of course _short shorts _but that's only normal cus' it's summer and it's blazing hot.

And besides they're just hanging in his pool.

Feeling a huge bulge forming he started to think about other things, only to end up back his first topic.

'_Damn her.'_

While Sasuke was indulging in his _thoughts,_ Sakura was busy ranting.

"andandan-Sasuke-kun?"

"Sasuke!"

" SASUKE!!"

"UCHIHA SASUKE!!"

"Huh?..Wha…."

Sasuke woke up from his reverie and looked up to see Sakura's serious face, which consist of a pout, a pair of big shining eyes and a tad bit of blush.

And like the last time, his eyes just won't obey him and kept staring at her pouty lips. Then those pouty lips opened and said:

"I want a cat. A rainbow colored one."

It was said in such a serious tone, it's almost like she wasn't kidding, like as if there is a rainbow colored cat, and since his mind is still a bit hazy, he blurted the first thing that came on his mind.

"Are you on crack?"

When Sakura's face twisted in rage, Sasuke knew that he just signed a death contract and that his hand and his dick would get really acquainted.

"um…shit.."

"What was that _Sasuke-kun?_"

"um..ah..I love you..?"

"SASUKEEE!!"

Oh how the mighty has fallen.

"_Ow…"_

_CAT__**S**_

"_Have you learnt your lesson now Sasuke-kun?"_

_-sweatsweat-_

"_Uh…ah..yeah.."_

_-gulp-_

"_Eh? Sasu-kun you're blushing!!"_

_-groan silently-_

"_Hey Sasu-kun what are you staring at-oh-"_

"_um..ah...shit.."_

"…_."_

_-sweatsweat-_

"_SASUKE YOU PERVERT!"_

_-punch-_

_CAT__**S**_

'_**I should really get her a cat to distract her…'**_

* * *

_**Reviews ?**_


	2. Of games and homeworks

**DISCLAIMER APPLIED**

Summary: _"Kura-chan let's play doctor!"_

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Humor

* * *

_GAME__**S**_

"_Aniki, aniki, aniki, aniki, anik-"_

"_What?!"_

"_Me and Kura-chan have babies!"_

_-choke-_

"_What?!"_

"_Yup! We have lots and lots of babies!"_

"_How?"_

"_We were playing pretend! I was the father!"_

"_Uhuh then?"_

"_Then we did what Ka-chan and Tou-chan did last night!"_

_-coughcoughchoke-_

"_WHAT?!!"_

_GAME__**S**_

Itachi could not believe this is happening.

All his other friends are happily partying and getting high out there while he, the awesome older Uchiha, is stuck here inside this damned mansion.

For him babysitting his foolish little brother and his so called 'wife' is not how he wanted to spend his Sunday night.

"Okaa-san, Tou-san why can't Kakashi-san babysit?" _whined _the ever so might older Uchiha.

He scowled, 'cuz he's too cool to pout, and proceeded to glare at his parents.

"Itachi dear, Kakashi is busy! Now remember don't let Sasuke near any papers okay?"

"Why?"

"Honey, eats every paper in his sight. Now be good!"

"And don't forget about my daughter!" shouted a red-haired woman.

And with that the Mikoto closed the door and the four of them went inside their very expensive limousine, leaving Itachi with two 6-year-olds.

'_This is so unfair!'_

He thought, with a frown marring his face, while walked up the stairs and went inside his brother's room only to see Sasuke eating something _white._

"Sasuke what are you eati-oh shit! Sasuke spit out that paper!!"

The boy only continued chewing and stuffing paper in his mouth.

"Sasuke!! Spit out that paper! Spit it out right now!!"

The boy still continued, ignoring his older brother. So Itachi was forced to rip the paper out of Sasuke's hands and opened his mouth to scoop out all the paper.

'_Ew…now what am I gonna do?' _he groaned and went to the bathroom to wash his saliva filled hands.

"FML." Was all Itachi said before going to his room to keep what's left of the chewed paper.

Meanwhile, Sakura was playing with Sasuke's stuffed dino when Sasuke remembered something he watched from one of Kakashi's videos.

He then turned to Sakura and proceeded to walk to her.

"Kura-chan, wanna play a game?"

Sakura hearing the word 'game' turned her head to him.

"What kind of game?"

Sakura asked, dropping the dino and turning to Sasuke.

"Let's play doctor!"

Then Sasuke took a long white jacket from his closet and dug into his toy box for his doctor kit. Sakura is of course very excited, so she agreed.

"I'm gonna be a doctor and you're gonna be my patient okay?"

Sakura nodded her head vigorously and sat obediently on Sasuke's bed.

"Okay, Kura-chan I need you to take off your dress."

Sasuke said with his 'doctor' face. The rosette instantly blushed and griped her dress.

"Um…Sasu-kun why?"

The boy raised an eyebrow on this, acting as if like the reason is obvious.

"Kura-chan I have to check on your development!"

Sakura is puzzled, what development?

"Eh? What development?"

"I have to check your body! I have to see if it's growing properly!"

The girl's blush increased tenfold, but she obeyed and took off her red dress. Leaving her in her cute pink panties and matching pink tube top, to cover up her _non-existent _chest.

"Kura-chan take of that thing too." Sasuke said pointing at the tube.

At first Sakura hesitated because her mom told her to show what's under it, but since it's just Sasuke she took it off, leaving her topless.

Sasuke then started to feel up her cheeks, copying what the person did on the video. A few minutes later, Sakura's face was completely red and Sasuke has a bit of red in his cheeks.

"Kura-chan take off your panties now."

This time Sakura refused. Sasuke got a bit angered and pushed Sakura on the bed, now her body was laying on the bed but her knee down to the toe are hanging at the edge.

"No!"

Sakura protested, closing her legs in. Sasuke ignored her and started pushing her legs apart and trying pulling her panties down.

And of course since Itachi is ever so lucky today, he was a granted an opportunity to witness this scene.

Itachi stood there gaping at the two children, who are completely oblivious to his presence.

The only thing that's right in his mind now is:

'_OMFGOMFGOMFGOMFGHOTHOTHOTHOT__**SYSTEMOVERLOAD!!**_'

When he finally regained his consciousness, he immediately grabbed Sasuke away from Sakura and carried him all the way until they reached the living room.

He then went back up and dressed Sakura. He did all this while something under his belt is throbbing very much.

'_God! Focus Itachi, focus!'_

At the exact moment that he finished, he heard the door opened and a faint scream of 'Ka-chan' and 'Tou-chan'.

He sighed and leaned on the staircase handle, watching Sakura run down the stairs and hug her parents.

"Itachi! Thanks for taking care of my baby!" Mrs. Haruno hollered, while Sasuke and Sakura hug each other goodbye like as if nothing happened.

Itachi smiled at them and waved goodbye, after that he turned to go to sleep for school tomorrow, wishing that he'll forget everything that happened today.

_GAME__**S**_

"_Class pass your home works to the front and I'll collect them."_

_-papers shuffling-_

_-sweatsweat-_

"_Itachi Uchiha stand."_

_-stands-_

"_Where's your homework?"_

_-mumble-_

"_Hm?"_

"…_.."_

"…_.."_

"_Um…My brother ate it…"_

_GAME__**S**_

_**FML…**_

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**_Reviews are my inspiration(:_**


	3. Of telephone conversations and clothes

**DISCLAIMER APPLIED**

Summary: _"Sooo, what are you wearing?"_

Rating: M

Genre: Romance/Humor

* * *

_HELL__**O**_

_-ringing-_

"_Yo."_

"_SASUKE-KUN!!"_

"_Hn?"_

"_MY KITCHEN'S BURNING!!"_

"_WHAT?"_

"_MY KITCHEN'S BURNI-"_

"_Hello?! SAKURA? SAKURA!"_

"…_."_

"_Oh… Sasuke-kun!"_

"_What happened?"_

"_Hehe…the phone dropped..hehe.."_

_HELL__**O**_

((ring..ring..ring..))

"_."_

"Sasuke-kun you should really take etiquette classes!"

"_Hn."_

"Hehe.."

"_Is there any reason why you call me in the middle of the night?"_

"Congrats Sasuke-kun! You just said a full sentence! I'm so proud of you!"

"_Sa-ku-ra.."_

"You know I always found it hot, when you call me that! It makes me…_horny.._"

"_-coughcoughchokes-"_

"SASUKE? BABY-CAKES ARE YOU ALRIGHT??"

"_What the hell Sakura what's wrong with you?"_

"What?!"

"_Did you eat Ice-cream after dinner?"_

"…."

"_Well?"_

"No…maybe..yes…"

"_How much?"_

"Tch. Just a scoop!"

"_Sakura…"_

"_OKAAAAAY_.FIIIIINE….one whole pint.."

"_ONE WHOLE PINT? Are you crazy Sakura?"_

"I was huuuuungry!"

"_-sigh-What am I going to do with you Sakura…."_

"Um…luuurve me??"

"_-sigh-"_

"Sasuke-kun what are you wearing just now?"

"_-choke-What the?"_

"Well, I'm wearing that cute black lacy panty that you like! You know that one with the pink ribbons at the side and I'm just wearing your Basketball jersey, the one you gave me, _with nothing under it…._what about you?"

"_What the hell? Sakura are you on crack?!"_

"Is my Sasu-cake shy? Are you wearing only boxers? Come one…tell me!!"

"_No."_

"Why not?"

"_Cuz it's stupid."_

"No it's not!"

"_Hn."_

"I bet your just in denial!"

"_Goodnight Sakura."_

"No! How dare you leave me like this!"

"_Goodnight."_

"SASUKE!!"

"_Bye."_

"SASUKE!!"

"…_."_

"YOU ARE SOO NOT GETTING ANY!!"

_HELL__**O**_

"_Hey."_

"_I'm not talking to you!"_

"_Suit yourself."_

"…_."_

"…_."_

"…_."_

"_BUTTHOLE!!"_

_HELL__**O**_

"_**NO SEX FOR A MONTH!"**_

* * *

**_Reviews make me high(;_**


	4. Of twilight and boyfriends

**DISCLAIMER APPLIED**

Summary:_ "OMG!! Sasuke-kun It's EDWARD!!"_

Rating: K+

Genre: Romance/Humor

OOC Sasuke

((**THIS WOULD BE MY LAST UPDATE UNTIL MY EXAMS ARE OVER...SO SORRY!! **I didn't like this that much, i hope you still like it though. My exams will start tomorrow and probably end 2 to 3 weeks later... I'm so sorry!! This is lyk my 'parting' gift soooo ENJOY!!))

* * *

_TWILIGH__**T**_

_-sob-_

_-twitch-_

"_Stop crying Sakura."_

"_Sasuke-kun he's just so sweet and romantic!"_

_-cry-_

"_Hn."_

"_You moron, you don't have a single romantic bone in your body"_

"_Sakura he's not even real…"_

"_WHO CARES?!!"_

_TWILIGH__**T**_

'_God, here she goes again…'_

"Sasuke-kun! Why can't you be like Edward? He's a vampire and yet he treats Bella like a princess! Why can't you be sweeter like him? He might be weird but he-"

This is their usual afternoon. Sakura rants to him about Edward and being romantic while Sasuke ignores her.

It's been their daily routine ever since she started reading the Twilight series.

"…also he almost sacrificed himself for her! Would you do tha-"

She would continue ranting until her favorite show comes on or when she gets tired from talking too much.

"…I don't even think you'll do that fo-"

'_When will she ever shut up?!"_

"SASUKE?! ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO M-"

'_Ah…my head hurts…'_

"…YOU DON'T EVEN PAY ATTENTI-"

'_Maybe I'll go to the park later…'_

"…SEE! SEE WHAT I MEA-"

"FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THINGS SANE, SAKURA SHUT UP!"

'_Mountain Sasuke has erupted; I repeat mountain Sasuke has erupted…RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!'_

Uchiha Sasuke, has gotten enough. He was furious, glaring at Sakura with all his might.

Usually Sakura is immune to his glares but this one is different, it looks so cold and he actually shouted at her. Sasuke never shouts unless he's really angry.

'_Sasuke-kun shouted at me…'_

She started tearing up and soon she was sobbing.

Sasuke was taken-aback was he that harsh?

Sasuke doesn't really know how to comfort people especially crying girls, so he just stood there staring at her, his face void of any emotion but his mind filled with worries.

And of course Sakura being Sakura misunderstood his actions.

"WAAAH!! I'M A BAD GIRLFRIEND!!"

She then dashed to the bathroom, leaving Sasuke standing there, stunned.

He stood there for only a few minutes and calmly walked towards the bathroom. He knocked very softly and in the most comforting voice he could muster he said:

"Sakura? Open the door, come on I'm not angry at you…Sakura..please?"

"Sasu-hic-ke-kun is-hic-angry at-hic-me!"

He pressed his ears at the door and listened intently but barely understood her, _'Then again…'_, he thought,' _with all the hiccups interrupting her, who would?'_

"No…I'm not, come on Sakura open the door.."

"Sa-hic-suke-kun is just-hic- pretending-hic!"

Sasuke sigh and was tempted to flung the door open but he knew that it would only make Sakura cry more, so…he begged.

"Please open the door…."

'_Gah! I'm disgracing the Uchiha name!'_

"Sa-hic-su-kun sh-hic-outed at-hic-me!"

"I know Sakura..I'm very…uh..s-sorry.."

"You are-hic-?"

"Yes."

And with that the door flung open and Sakura glomped Sasuke. Both fell down on the flood with a loud 'thud'.

"Sasuke-kun I'm sooooo sorry!"

"Shh…it's okay Sakura…"

For a few more minutes pink-haired-girl continued to cry while the raven-haired-man finally learned how to comfort others.

_TWILIGH__**T**_

"_Sasuke-kun…"_

"_Hm?"_

"_You're way better than Edward!"_

"_Hn."_

"_But still a romantically constipated moron!"_

"_What's with you and constipation? You're not having it right?"_

"…_.."_

"_SASUKEEE!!"_

_TWILIGH__**T**_

"_**OW."**_

* * *

**REVIEWS AND CRITISM ARE LOVED!!**

**SO PLEASE REVIEW AND WISH ME GOODLUCK!!**

_I'm also such a review whore...SATISFY MY NEEDS!!_


	5. Of conversations and recordings

**DISCLAIMER APPLIED**

Summary: _"I love you.I love you.I love you.I love you"_

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Humor

Somewhat OOC Sasuke

((I'm so very sorry! This is story is so damn crappy. I HATE IT! It's so rushed!))

* * *

_IL__**Y**_

"_Sasuke-kun!"_

"_Hn."_

"_ILY!!"_

"_WTF."_

"_ILY!!"_

"_WTF."_

"_ILY!!"_

"…_huh..?"_

_IL__**Y**_

"Sasuke-kun?"

"Hm?"

"I love you!"

"Hn."

"Do you love me?"

"…."

"Sasuke-kun?"

"…yes…"

"Can you please say it!"

"…."

"Sasuke-kun for me please?"

" ….ah..I love you…"

"Thankies!!"

"Hn."

"_I love you.I love you.I love you.I love you"_

"What was that?"

"Nothing.."

"Sakura.."

"Um…well…it's your voice!"

"Obviously."

"And I recorded it when you told me the L-word!"

"Why?"

"So I could hear it every time!"

"Why?"

"Cuz' I know you wouldn't say it all the time!"

"Hn."

"SEE!!"

"_I love you.I love you.I love you.I love you"_

"_Hn."_

_IL__**Y**_

"_I love you.I love you.I love you.I love you"_

"_Sakura stop it."_

"_No!"_

"_Turn it off."_

"_No! I wanna hear it!"_

"_Sakura…"_

"_Sasuke…"_

_-tackle-_

"_NO!"_

_-press-_

"_I love you.I love you.I love you.I love you"_

"_Stop-AH-tickl-hahaha-ing-me-ah-!"_

_-chuckles-_

"_I love you.I love you.I love you.I love you"_

"_Hahahaha! Sasuke-kun!"_

"_**I love you."**_

_IL__**Y**_

"_**I love you.I love you.I love you.I love you"**_

* * *

Crappy right?! So bring on the flames! (jkjkjkjk)

Anyways if my parents caught me I'm dead so adios!

**REVIEW PLS!!**


	6. Of pain and fairytales

**DISCLAIMER APPLIED**

Summary: ".._and..they..live..happily.. ever..after.."_

Rating: K+

Genre: Romance/Angst

OOC Sasuke

((taken from **TENSHIyeahs**. Done with permission. I changed it a tiny bit.))

Btw, her parents found out about her stories and she got parental control on her com now. She can't go to anymore. That's why she suddenly disappeared! D: (she's my classmate and bff!)

* * *

_LOVE.M__**E**_

"_Sasuke-kun…do you think that…that our relationship might last…forever?"_

"_Hn…maybe…"_

"_Hm…okay then!"_

"…"

"_I love you Sasuke-kun!"_

"_Ah…me too…"_

_LOVE.M__**E**_

"_Sasuke…-kun…"_

Sasuke abruptly sat up, eyes calculating and wandering. Feeling wetness in his face, he touched it and realized that he has been crying, again.(_patheticpatheticpathetic_)

He stood up, trying to remember what was happening before collapsing in exhaustion and too much intake of alcohol.(_dontforgetdontforget_)

And when he did, fresh new tears started rolling down his cheeks like a tiny waterfall.(_crycryfeelthepain)_

He tried(_triedsofuckinghard)_to convince himself. He hopes and prays(_God,pleaseplease)_ that she would still love him(_sakurasakurasakura)_even after all the things he did to her.(_sorrysorrysorry)_

He punishes himself, cutting his arm(_slash..drip..drip.._)everytime he remembers the bad things he did to her.

He wants to die, to end his suffering but he's scared(_cowardcowardcoward_)of dying, of death.

He wishes(_I wish…_)everynight to be with her, and dreams of a fairy-tale life.(_andtheylivehappilyeverafter_)

_Sakura…_

(_a fairy-tale life-cuts you up like a knife_)

Sakura woke up, feeling tired but happy. Her life turned downside up and she loves every single moment of it.

But…she has a feeling. It was bugging and annoying her; it was as if something was off. She just couldn't put her finger on to it.(_idontgetwhatswrong_)

Every time she was alone, she would just suddenly feel lonely and depressed.(_idontwantthisfeeling)_

She knows, telling Itachi would be, like Shikamaru always say, _troublesome. _

So she keeps quiet, venting out the feeling using physical pain.

(_put on a mask-do the task-keep silent-be violent_)

But the feeling gets worse and started bugging her more.(_leavemealone!_)

And in the end she lost.(_loserloserloser_)

She gave up, and went to _new lover_.(_helpmehelpme_)

As expected, he helped her, making her everyday like a fairy-tale.(_thelifeSasuke__**desperately**__wants_)

Soon, the feeling was forgotten.

(_forgotten in the dark-locked up and unmarked_)

_LOVE.M__**E**_

"…_Sakura…"_

_-silence-_

"…_forgive me…"_

_LOVE.M__**E**_

"_**Sasuke-kun…"**_

* * *

REVIEW PLS! Angel and MEH!! XD

And I juz finished my last exam MATHS!! T.T

I left more than 5 questions blank...imma fail

I HATE MATH AND EXAMS!!


	7. Of movies and kissing

**DISCLAIMER APPLIED**

Summary: _"Let's watch Alice in Wonderland!"_

Rating: K+

Genre: Romance/Humor

Sasuke is a bit OOC.

for my reviewers XD

**Ginga Ninja**-My first reviewer I LUV U!! T.T _((tears of chu!))_

**xemotionallyCONSTIPATEDx** - I DEMAND AN UPDATE!! _((or I won't ;D))_

**-siMpLe-reActiON-** - It's my fave of all the stories!! _((IT'S NOT STORY-IST))_

**mirrorshanze** - WER IS MY LONG OVERDUED COOKIE??!! _((i'm dying of cookie starvation ))_

**XxEmo BitchXx** - Ur not a B!tch ur a **DARLING**!! XD Btw, WER IS MY COOKIE TOO??!

**xxiluvemoboyzxx** - I wuz rite! Chappie 2 is my best! XD

**xX-BeArHuGs-Xx** - Ur name is so _CHU_!!

**Shikazu-chan** - Ur such a _CHU_!!

**HlorkexD** - lol ur name reminds me of** HORLICKS! **

**rainbow spell** - heyheyheyhey!! UPDATEEE!!

**Miki-chann** - Thankies!! REVIEW!! XD

If I miss anyone, blame the BRAIIIIN!!!))

_COME ON SAY IT WITH ME! __**CHU!**_

* * *

_WONDERLAN__**D**_

"_I wish my name is Alice!"_

"_Hn."_

"_I mean Sakura is sooo last season!"_

"_Hn."_

"_Alice is so cute and sassy!"_

"_Hn."_

"_And your name is sooo FUGLY!"_

"_Hn….WHAT?!"_

_WONDERLAN__**D**_

"SASUKESASUKESASUKESASUKE!!"

"_What?" _

A boy at the age of 12 groaned out, irritated by the continuous screaming of his name.

'_God…the way she screams it makes it sound so…wrong…'_

"Let's watch Alice in Wonderland in 3D! They're showing it today!"

Sakura bounced lightly on her, with her hair bouncing with her, a smile gracing her pouty lips. Sasuke couldn't help but stare at her.

She looked like as if she came out of a storybook. His little cousin even thought she was a fairy!

'_A seriously LOUD fairy._'

"SASUKE! ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME?!"

Sakura screamed at his ear, breaking Sasuke from his musings. The said boy winced and half-heartedly glared at his female companion.

"Sooooo…"

"Hn…"

"Yay! Thankies Sasu-cakes!"

Sakura then glomped Sasuke and proceeded to squeeze the life out of him. She gave a little peck to his lips and bounced off.

'_She ate too much sugar again…_'

After a few minutes of pulling, talking and bouncing, they finally reached the desired cinema.

Sasuke went off to buy the tickets and 3D glasses, while Sakura joined the line to buy a popcorn and a drink that would be shared between her and Sasuke.

Once they were all ready, they went in the dark room.

_**skipskipskipskipskipskipskipskipskipskip**_

After about 2 hours, they emerged out of the room with Sakura attached to Sasuke's arm while talking animatedly and Sasuke with a small frown.

Unfortunately for Sasuke, the movie was set in Alice's perspective and Sasuke doesn't really like to pretend as a girl with an overactive imagination.

But it was all worth it when Sakura, voluntarily kissed him on the lips, which of course turn into a full blown make out session.

Luckily for him, Sakura kissed him when they're passing a secluded park or else everyone could have seen them literally having _mouth sex_.

'_I should take her out more often…_'

_WONDERLAN__**D**_

"_Sasuke-kun did you enjoy it?"_

"_It's…okay, I guess."_

"_Great, cuz they're showing a Bambi 3D movie now!"_

"_No."_

"_Why not?!"_

"_Cuz it's stupid-mmphm!"_

"_Well?"_

"…_.."_

"…_.."_

"…_yes…"_

_WONDERLAN__**D**_

"_**So cute!"**_

* * *

Can sumone gve me an idea? I'm running out! _((im also running out of tears))_

**IM A REVIEW WHORE! SATISFY MEEEEEEEEH! XD**

_I have needs dammit!_


	8. Of costumes and Holloween

**DISCLAIMER APPLIED**

Summary:_ "You never told me that you're this hot."_

Rating: M

Genre: Romance/Humor

Sasuke is a bit OOC.

((next chappie has lemon!! XD))

**Miki-chann**-Wow, you actually liked it! XD

**xemotionallyCONSTIPATEDx****-**Hey, would you look at that, I'm updating!! Now where's yours?! *glare*

**mirrorshanze**-I'm giving you lime!! NOW GIVE ME COOKIE!!

**Shikazu-chan**-UR SOOOOO _CHU!!_ *huggles*

**HlorkexD**-Weeeell, I think it's a wheat drink or sumting!! 8D Oh and ur idea is AWESUM!! I'm currently making the story now!! CRABS!

**XxEmo BitchXx**-MY DARLING!! YOU REVIEWED!! T.T (_tears of chu!_)

**Ginga Ninja****-**Hehe…HE WOULD SUFFER THE DEER OF DOOM!! (lol, DD-deer of doom!) Hmm…maybe we can use thunderstorms?!

**Thanks for all the reviews!**

**They made me feel adored, luved and **_**chu!!**_

**So now, I'm updating for you!! **

_(lol it's a mini poem XD)_

* * *

_F.M__**E**_

"_Hey, Sasuke-kun do I look nice?"_

_-turn/eyes widen/choke-_

"_WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU WEARING?"_

"_Well…do I look nice?"_

"_Ah…um…ya... real nice…"_

"_Aww! Thankies Sasuke-kun!"_

_-glomp-_

_F.M__**E**_

Tonight is the night that Sakura has been waiting for ever since she turned eighteen.

This is the night where everyone can finally see what a hot babe she really is!

She will shed all those ugly, concealing clothes she is forced to wear everyday by her protective father(who is currently in England), and wear that UH-mazing cute and not to mention _sexy _Dominatrix costume.

She would finally be able to show her hunkalicious boyfriend, what she is truly made of!

"OMG!! Sakura you look hot_ and sexy_! You are so gonna knock out Sasuke once he sees you!"

Squealed by her pig-of-a-best friend, Ino. She is wearing a sexy police costume completed with a long leather whip.

They are currently preparing to go to Naruto Uzumaki's Halloween party; it is one of the biggest and most important parties.

All the coolest and hottest guys(_"Sasuke-kun!!"_)would definitely be there so not a single girl would miss this chance to show off.

Even shy not so little Hinata is wearing a provocative nurse outfit and Ten Ten being Ten Ten decided to pretend as Jill Valentine of Resident Evil, she is wearing the complete set along with the guns and even let her hair down.

When the girls are all finished, they went out of Sakura's house and immediately whistles and cat calls were heard.

The girls strutted to Sakura's cherry red Ferrari convertible and drove off to party.

Immediately when they arrive, guys turned their heads and flirts were thrown.

Everyone was very surprised, no one ever thought that under those ugly oversized t-shirt and jeans, was a hell of a sexy body.

Of course some people do wonder what she's hiding, especially Sasuke but they always forget and move on with their lives.

The girls made their way into an empty table and sat down, Ino went to get drinks while Sakura went to find her boyfriend, when suddenly strong and pale arms encircled her waist.

"Sasuke-kun!"

She squealed and Sasuke teasingly nip her neck and collar bone. Grinding his crotch to her barely covered butt.

"You never told me that you're this hot."

She smiled at him, smacking the hand that's getting too near her _private_ part. And moaned when his wandering hands squeezed her twin mounds.

"Well, you never asked!"

He smirked at her neck and started to steer her in one of the empty rooms in the house.

"True. I never did but let's move on, I'm feeling adventurous. I'll explore that body of yours."

'_Kya! Sasuke-kun!'_

_F.M__**E**_

"_Wow…that was wow…"_

"_Hn. Speechless?"_

_-smirk-_

"_Hey, Sasuke-kun…"_

"_Hn?"_

"_Again…?"_

_-smirks-_

"_With pleasure."_

_-squeal-_

_F.M__**E**_

"_**HARDER!!"**_

* * *

**(this was a fast update rite?! Still need ideas!!)**

This is my Halloween treat for you guys! I won't be updating till about November sumthing, IM GOING TO MEET GRANDMA!

**DON'T FORGET, I'M A REVIEW WHORE!!**

**SATISFY MEEEEEEEEEH!**

_I still have needs dammit!!_


	9. Of toys and sex

**DISCLAIMER APPLIED**

Summary:_ "Sasu-ah-ke! Some-oh-thing.. is inside-AH!- me!"_

Rating: M

Genre: Romance/Humor

((GRANDMA IS AWESUM!))

Miki-chann-IM UPDATING XD!! Lemons 8D

xemotionallyCONSTIPATEDx-Fiiiiine! ButT update soon :DD

XxEmo BitchXx-(-/ \-) ITACHI FACE! XD

HlorkexD- lol, here's ur lemonade! Drink up! XD

MewAlice- OMG! I luv u! Ur damn _CHU!!_

mirrorshanze-Everyone has their dark side XD! COOKIES!! 8D

Ginga Ninja- hehe grandma stuffed me wit cookies!! XD [_OMG! I gained weight! T.T_]

Shikazu-chan-Aww. You didn't review! T.T

rainbow spell-Thankies! XD Hope you like lemons! 8D

* * *

_OOH.M**Y**_

"_AH!"_

_-grunt-_

"_Harder!"_

_-growl-_

"_Harder!"_

_-sweat-_

"_Dammit Sasuke-kun HARDER!"_

"_This is the hardest I could get!"_

"_You're strong aren't you? You have lots of muscles! HARDER!"_

_-growl-_

"_IT'S NOT ME! THIS DAMN BOTTLE JUST WON'T OPEN!!"_

_OOH.M**Y**_

"Sakura what's wrong?"

Both are currently in Sasuke's beach house, lounging at the porch, they both decided to spend the school holidays there, instead of staying at home.

The pink head was squirming and kept shifting on her chair.

Sasuke looked at her curiously and moved closer to her.

"Sakura?"

"Ah…something is in my-oh-flow-ah!"

Sakura was trembling with her face scarlet red. Sasuke moved an inch closer.

"Flow-ah? Huh?"

Sasuke was of coursed confused. He had never heard of such thing. And Sakura is acting weirdly, which confused him more.

The previous night, both were humping each other like as if it's the last hump they get.

Sasuke sighed in contentment. Then suddenly he remembered something.

"Sakura did I take out th-Sakura?"

Sakura was bent over, she was flushed, sweating, trembling and has this pleasurable look on her face. And Sasuke knows that Sakura only makes that face when she's orgasming.

When Sakura finished, she stopped moving because moving would only make the _'thing' _inside of her to move more.

"Sasuke…you….ah…forgot to..ha…take out the balls..ha…"

"Aa, I just remembered."

Sakura was still trembling and Sasuke lifted her up and brought her to their room, laying her on the bed.

"Sasuke wha-"

"I'm gonna take it out."

He then pulled her shorts and stared at her flushed flower. He roamed his eyes to find the string connected to the Ben Wa balls, so that he could pull it out.

When he was unsuccessful, he stretched her pussy open which earned a groan from her, and looked for a small white string. He opened her pussy further and found two silver balls snuggled tightly deep inside her and the string with them.

"Sakura it's really deep inside."

She groaned and her thigh twitched.

"I don't care how but please take it out!"

Sasuke inwardly smirked at this, and crawled up to suck on her swelled pink nipples.

"I'll make you come really hard, so hard that it'll push the balls out."

Sakura moaned at his words, and wrapped her arms around his neck.

***L*****E*****M*****O*****N***_A_*_D_*_E_*

Sasuke thrusted his tongue into her mouth while his left hand kneed her breast and his right hand played with her clit.

He then moved his mouth to her right breast and proceeded to assault it. He bit her nipple harshly, making Sakura scream his name out.

He suckled her breast once more, then he went down and swirled his tongue in her pink navel, while his right hand is still playing with her clit.

He moved down and placed his head snuggly between her creamy thighs and gave her pussy a long, hard lick which made her moan quite loudly.

He sat up, hooked his hands under her thighs and brought her weeping flower to his awaiting mouth.

He kissed her pussy and circling it with his tongue. Then suddenly he thrusted his tongue into her ass and proceeded to ravish it, nipping and biting it harshly, while his right hand fondled her breast violently.

After a few minutes of fondling and biting, she came hard, pleasure racking her body brutally.

"Is..ah.. it..oh.. out?" she gasped out, still recovering from the after-effects.

Sasuke looked around, searching for two small silver balls, when he found none; he looked inside her and saw the two balls.

It seems like it moved but only a bit. Looks like Sakura's _too _tight.

"No not yet."

Without any warning, he thrusted his thick and hard 8 inch cock into her cute pink butt hole up to the hilt. Sakura screamed when suddenly a big _thing _was shoved up her ass.

He felt immense pleasure flowing through his veins; he groaned and looked at her.

His hands were lifting her thighs so that his dick can be all comfy inside. He can also see her red face, growing redder by the minute.

With a deep rumble in his chest, he pull out and pushed back in, without giving Sakura any time to get use to it, he started thrusting in and out brutally.

He was thrusting in her blindly and wildly, shedding all his morals just for this. His hand playing and pinching her clit.

Sakura felt an excruciating pain at first but gradually it was replaced with pleasure and soon she found herself sightlessly grinding to him, mewling and moaning loudly.

The balls were bumping to each other inside her, vibrating her walls and adding to the pleasure.

Soon both was overwhelmed with pleasure, Sakura was the first one to orgasm, screaming Sasuke's name, her sticky fluid dripping down to the bed sheets and blanket covering her and Sasuke with cum.

When her white hot seeds touched Sasuke's cock, he was sent flying to the edge, cumming ruthlessly inside her, filling her ass with her seed.

Sasuke roared out Sakura's name, his cock twitching inside her, whit spots blocking his vision. He gave in to his body' desire and collapse beside her.

***L*****E*****M*****O*****N***_A_*_D_*_E_*

The balls slid out of Sakura's cunt and onto the blanket. Sasuke's hand went to pull the blanket, when he felt a cold and smooth object touch his hands; he brought it up to see what it is.

The silver balls twinkled deviously. He smirked and looked over to Sakura and saw her fast asleep.

He kept the ball in the night stand drawer and lied back down to rest.

"_Hn…"_

_OOH.M**Y**_

_-moan-_

"_Sakura?"_

"_Saus-ah-ke…ah-somethings-oh…inside me!"_

"_Hm….I see, let me help you again…"_

_-shuffling-_

"…_."_

"_SASUKE!!"_

_OOH.M**Y**_

"_**Hmm…maybe I should put a rotor next…?"**_

* * *

Jack and Jill went up the hill

To let them have some fun~

Jill the dill forgot the pill

Now they have a son~!

Likes?!

Review pls!!

_**I'm still a review whore and still have needs!**_

And gimme ideas too!

_I wanna reach 60 reviews!!_


	10. Of hopelessness and forgotten love

**DISCLAIMER APPLIED**

Summary_: "She_ _is his sanity, his other half but his goals made him leave her."_

Rating: K+

Genre: Romance/Angst

Sasuke OOC

((Another **Tenshi** production!))

((You guys I'm going to Phil!! XD But the com der has no internet connection DX So I won't be updating for a while D: ))

Better prepare a tissue for this!!

xemotionallyCONSTIPATEDx-It's gonna be a loooooong time until I make anoder lemon!

Shikazu-chan- HAHAHA!! I luv the beginning to XD Hope u lyk this one! It's sad :D

Miki-chann- Dear child, you have an awesum mind XD I likey ur idea! I mite juz make it XD Oh and prepare urself a box of tissue!

HlorkexD- HAHA I was just drinking lemonade the oder day!! AND HORLICKS!!

missXsukisho-Lol u wer rite (; and tnx for helping/reviewing! XD The Itachi is my favfav too! XD

hope u lyk some sorrows!

XxEmo BitchXx- 8B I thought it was nasty too! I still can't believe I wrote it! XD

mirrorshanze-BABY LEON!! XD Wen I was writing that chapter I thought I'm burning or sumthing!! IT'S TOO HOT FOR MEH!! XD TISSUE!!

rainbow spell-O.o Haha sowie bout that! Hope u lyk sadness!

Ixstarr- OH SHUSH!! Ur being too dramactic dear old frend!! XD

((**IF ANYONE CAN GUESS MY NAME AND AGE, I'LL EITHER INCLUDE YOU IN A CHAPTER OR WRITE A DEDICATED CHAPTER TO YOU WITH YOUR PREFENCES. **xemotionallyCONSTIPATEDx **AND **Ixstarr **ARE OUT OF THE CONTEST SINCE DEY NOE ME PERSONALY!**))

* * *

___SAKURA**!**_

"_Sakura…"_

"_Hmm?"_

"…_Will you…marry me?"_

"…_."_

"_Sakura..?"_

"…_yes!"_

_SAKURA**!**_

Sakura was strolling around the village she is currently hiding in.

She was currently thinking of her past, the one she shared with Sasuke.

'_I should really stop thinking about this.'_

She sighed and sat down beside a big, old oak tree.

She left Konoha 1 year ago. She was framed of breaking into a special archive, where all the forbidden jutsu scrolls were kept.

When the Jonins was investigating, a strand of pink hair was found on one of the scrolls and being the only pink-haired girl in the country, Sakura was immediately sentenced for execution.

And before all of that happened, she was living a peaceful happy life being Sasuke's fiancé.

Then she went on a dangerous mission and came back half-dead. After that, she was diagnosed to be barren.

Sakura was very upset and hoped that Sasuke would not leave her, but unfortunately her fear came true.

Sasuke wanted a family and with Sakura he could not achieve that so he left her…again.

Sakura was arrested, when she was still resting at the hospital, she was brought to the council and they told her what she did and her punishment.

So enraged and distressed, she left Konoha and hid in an unknown village, hidden by mountains.

In there she started a new life and was happy for a while but soon felt lonely.

She missed the nights of having company in bed. She felt as if her bed suddenly grew big.

She started missing Sasuke.

But suddenly a voiced just spoke out in her mind. It was telling her to move on and just forget.

It told her lots of things, it made her feel less lonely. She was curious on who this voiced belongs to. She tried many times to find out but failed miserably.

So she gave up and listened to the voice, forgetting everything that hurts her.

…_**Forget **__him…_

…_Forget __**him**__…_

…_**Forget him…**_

[..:.]

Sasuke suddenly felt an unbearable pain in his chest when he was just strolling on the backyard at the Uchiha Mansion.

He was thinking about Sakura. Imagining that she's still here, by his side.

After Sakura left, Sasuke made up a whole new world.

A world where he and Sakura are still together…

A world where he is happy…

A world where he can make Sakura happy…

Sometimes he even pretends that the pillow he hugs at night is Sakura, and sometimes he hugs himself desperately imagining her arms around him.

He even hires prostitutes and transformed them into Sakura so that he could just forget everything and make himself think that she never left.

But the moment he opens his eyes in the morning, he does not see Sakura but just a girl. Reality crashes at him every time he opens his cursed eyes.

He is miserable. He is nothing without Sakura.

She is his sanity, his other half but his goals made him leave her.

The pain came again, but more painful. He clutched his chest,_wherehis__**heart**__is, _and his knees buckled from the pain. Tears are now rolling down his cheeks.

It….It feels like…_Sakura'slettinghimgo…._

The pain became more intense, he can't take it anymore, he faints from the pain, collapsing on the ground, crying in silent agony.

'_Sakura…don't forget…'_

was his only thoughts, but one thing he didn't know….._hewasalredybeing__**forgotten**__…._

_...__**Don't **__forget…_

…_Don't __**forget**__..._

…_**Don't forget…**_

___SAKURA**!**_

"_Sakura…"_

"…_."_

"_I…love you…very much…"'_

"_.…"_

"_Do you…love me too?"_

"…_."_

"_Sakura..?"_

"…_."_

"_Do you..?"_

"…_."_

___SAKURA**!**_

"_**I'm sorry…"**_

* * *

REVIEW!!

And don't forget about my contest! XD


	11. Of beach and bitches

**DISCLAIMER APPLIED**

Summary:_ "So you'll finally stopped fucking yourself with that pole in your ass to go to the beach!"_

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Humor

((Okies for the story b4 this, Sakura is wanted in Konoha, so if she stayed there and didn't leave she'll be put in execution DX sooo she left! :D))

Guys I'm leaving next week to Philippines! I won't be updating till then D:

Hehe so far no one guessed correctly! [IM NOT THAT OLD!!]

**Clue: My name starts with an A and ends with an A.**

* * *

_BOOBIE**S**_

"_Sasuke-kun!"_

"_Hn?"_

"_We're going to the beach!!"_

"_Hn."_

"_We're gonna see crabs!"_

"_Hn."_

"_And I'm gonna run around naked!!"_

"_HN!"_

_BOOBIE**S**_

"_SASU-BABY!!"_

The blond-idiot, known as Naruto, screamed through the phone.

Sasuke grimaced and scowled.

"Dobe, I'm straight."

He heard a growl at the other side.

"_SO AM I! Your such a teme! It's a mystery that Sakura-chan hangs out wit-"_

"What do you want?"

Sasuke said, cutting off the blond. He winced when a Naruto shouted 'teme' through the phone loudly.

"_Teme! Where going to the beach! Get that pole in your ass and meet us there with Sakura-chan!"_

Without another word, Naruto hang up, not giving the Uchiha time to reject.

Sasuke cursed under his breath and proceed to dial Sakura.

"_ring…ring…ring…ring…click…Sasuke-kun!"_

Hearing her excited voice, Sasuke smiled.

"Sakura, Naruto wants us to meet them at the beach."

"_So you'll finally stopped fucking yourself with that pole in your ass to go to the beach!"_

Sasuke scowled and glared at the phone, hoping that his glare would reach Sakura.

"_Sasucakes please stop glaring at the phone! It might break."_

Sasuke scowled deepened when he heard Sakura laughing.

"Hn. Keep this up and you could to the beach on your own."

Sakura fake gasp and he smirked at her dramatic action.

"_Sasuke-kun but what if I get raped?!"_

"Who would want to rape you?"

He scoffed at her and smirked at her protests.

"_You're so mean! Anyways, I'm in Tsunade's house, pick me up?!"_

"Ya, sure. I'll be there in about half an hour."

And with that he hung up and went to pack the things he need. He wore his black basketball shorts and a simple wife beater.

He then went to his car, and proceeded to drive his way to Tsunade's house.

After a few minutes of driving and fan girls chasing him. He finally reached Tsunade's house. Sakura was already outside, wearing his old white basketball jersey, with his name imprinted on it, and dark pink short shorts.

"Never knew that you kept it."

He mumbled and Sakura grinned.

Sasuke and Sakura met each other when they were very young because their parents are childhood friends.

So they grew up with each other and naturally became the best of friends.

Soon they went off for the beach. Due to the traffic that's going on, they got a bit late which irked both of them.

Naruto also kept calling which irritated them more.

When the traffic finally cleared, they sped off, reaching the beach at last.

As soon as they set foot on the sand, Ami and her friends immediately swarmed around Sasuke, squealing and shrieking.

Annoyed, Sakura pushed through the girls, grabbed Sasuke's wrist and pulled Sasuke to their group. Ami being the bitch she is, screamed across the beach that Sakura was a whore.

Saying that, they were late because Sakura 'corrupted' Sasuke. Ami's friends automatically agreed, screaming taunts at Sakura. Murmurs broke out everywhere.

Sakura seethed with rage, she let go of Sasuke's wrist and proceed to walk back to Ami to deliver her well deserved bitch slap.

But a hand pulled Sakura back, she back and saw Sasuke glaring at Ami.

"Bitch!"

Sasuke snarled at Ami. She was stunned; she did not expect Sasuke to shout at her. She fell on the sand, landing on her artificially bony butt.

Once again whispers broke out.

"You dare talk like that to Sakura again, and I'll get you arrested."

Sasuke growled at Ami.

"But Sasuke-kun she's not even your girlfriend!"

One of Ami's friends whined with her unpleasant high-pitched voice.

"She is."

When he said that, there was a moment of silence, then gasps were heard.

"WHAT?!"

Sakura shouted, staring at Sasuke with wide eyes.

Sasuke stared at her blankly; he then crashed his lips on hers and proceeded to kiss her harshly, moving his lips against her own. Soon she was kissing back.

When they broke apart, Sakura's face was as pink as her hair, maybe even more. She was dazed, as if drunk.

He then dragged her to his car and drove off somewhere.

Ami was still sitting on the sand stunned. Then suddenly she felt a sharp pain on her butt.

"CRAAAAB!"

She shrieked and shook her butt to shake off the crab that was still holding on.

"GEEEEET OOOFF!!"

*With Sasuke and Sakura*

Sasuke stopped the car, parking beside a tree in a secluded playground.

Sakura turned to him, still a bit dazed.

"Sasuke-kun am I really your girlfriend?"

She asked, looking up to him but then lowered her gaze when he did not reply.

Unexpectedly, she was pulled on Sasuke's lap, he smashed his lips onto hers and 'mouth raped' her.

"_I guess that's a yes!"_

_BOOBIE**S**_

"_Aww…Sasuke-kun I didn't get to run around naked!"_

"…_."_

"_And I thought my dream would finally come true!"_

"…_."_

"_Do you even care at all?!"_

"…_I have an indoor pool?"_

"…_."_

"…_."_

"_THAT'S PERFECT!"_

_BOOBIE**S**_

"…_**.pretty..pretty..boobies..!"**_

* * *

**_Review pls! (:_**


	12. Of thunderstorms and snakes

**DISCLAIMER APPLIED**

Summary:_ "Hn. Never knew that the great Sakura Haruno, granddaughter of the world renowned doctor Tsunade, the only heir to the Haruno fortune, is afraid of thunderstorms."_

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Humor

[Aww! Thankies 4 all the loving review guys!!

I _CHU _you all!! ;* [especially HlorkexD(I _**CHU **_your name!!)]

Anyways…about the contest…:D

aOikurO23-DUDE!! YOU GOT MY NAME!! LYK OHMIGOSH!! XD But you have to guess which one's my name from the ones you mentioned :D Oh, and Im not THAAAAT old ;)

Miki-chann-DUDE!! YOU GOT MY AGE!! XD XD XD XD XD!! 8B But you have to guess which is my age from the one you wrote ;D GOODLUCK!!

For the other people who didn't get it…ANOTHER CLUE!!

**Hint: Age, 12 to 15 :D**

_ENJOY~!_]

WHO CAN GUESS THE MOVIE MENTIONED HERE?!

* * *

_SNAKES**S**_

"_Sasuke-kun! Hug meeeeeh!"_

"_Hn."_

"_HUG!!"_

_-glomps-_

"_Aa."_

"_BIIIG HUUUG!!"_

"_Huh?"_

"_Teletubbies Sasuke-kun! TELETUBBIES!!"_

"…_."_

"…_.those little shit-heads…."_

_SNAKES**S**_

Sakura is an emotionally and physically strong person.

She does not fear a lot of things.

She is afraid of snakes,('_KYA! SASUKE-KUN GET YOUR SNAKE AWAY FROM ME!_')but unfortunately her boyfriend adores snakes and keeps them as a pet.

Also she is afraid of-

((CRACKLE-BOOM))

"SASUKEEEEE!!"

-thunderstorms.

The couple is in the Uchiha mansion. Both are currently watching a movie,('_LOOK!LOOK!THE DOG CAN TALK!'_)and cuddling on the only orange loveseat,('_Ugh, Sakura why orange?!_')in Sasuke's room.

"I know Sakura I'm not deaf."

Sakura blew raspberries and squealed when another loud crackling sound appeared.

"Sasukeeee!" Sakura whined, clutching the sleeves of Sasuke's shirt.

She jumped to his lap when an even louder sound came. Sasuke chuckled and affectionally pat her pink head.

It was rare to see Sakura so afraid of something and since thunderstorms rarely come to Konoha, he didn't know that she was afraid of it.

He chuckled again, snaking his arms around her waist.

"Hn. Never knew that the great Sakura Haruno, granddaughter of the world renowned doctor Tsunade, the only heir to the Haruno fortune, is afraid of thunderstorms."

Sakura grimaced and continuously punched his chest, screaming 'bastard' repeatedly. Sasuke winced at her punches; he knows his chest would be bruised because of her monstrous strength.

Sakura yelp when the thunder resounded in Sasuke's room and grabbed him.

Sasuke wrapped his arms around Sakura and proceed to comfort her.

"You ass!" she whispered, lightly hitting his chest.

Sasuke smiled and rested his cheek on her head.

"Aa. I'm not an ass."

Sakura stared at him.

"Riiiight." She said sarcastically, giggling afterwards.

"Fine. But I'm a hot ass!"

Sasuke smirked and Sakura laughed, her body shaking with laughter.

After a few hours thunderstorm calmed and the couple decided to just sleep, both exhausted but happy.

Sasuke kissed Sakura's forehead, smiling when she cuddled further.

'_Hn.I love thunderstorms.'_

_SNAKES**S**_

"_SASUKEEEE!"_

"_What?"_

"_HEBIIII!"  
"…."_

"_SASUKE! YOUR SNAKE IS CRAWLING UP MY LEG!"_

_-stare-_

"_STOP STARING AND HEEELP!"_

"_SASUKE-ACK!"_

_-blushblush-_

"_STOP IT!!"_

_-stare-_

"_OMG! IT'S GOING INSIDE MY-AAH!"_

_-nosebleed-_

"_SASUKEEEE!"_

_-faints-_

_SNAKES**S**_

"_**Note to self: get more snakes."**_

* * *

Reviews make me write(:


	13. Of Christmas and bonds

**DISCLAIMER APPLIED**

Summary: "Sasuke-kun? What do you want for Christmas?"

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Humor

Miki-chann-Yup that's my age![ain't I young xD] you have to guess my name :D

Another clue peeps!

**Hint: Name has a c.**

* * *

_Kurisumasu__**!**_

"_JINGLE BELLS, JINGLE BELLS, JINGLE ALL THE WAAAAAAY! OOOH-"_

_-children starts crying-_

_-wince-_

"_Naruto stop singing dammit! You're scaring all the kids!"_

"_But Sakura-chan I must display my Christmas youth!"_

_-sigh-_

"_You sound like a dying squirrel dobe."_

"_URUSAI TEME!! I can sing whatever I want, whenever I want! YOU CAN'T STOP MEEE!"_

"_Naruto do-!"_

"_WEEEEE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS! WEE-"_

"_Dob-!"_

"_RUDOLF THE RED NOSE REINDEER! HA-"_

_-groan-_

_-covers ear-_

"_DECK THE HALLS WITH SASUKE'S GAY BALLS! FALALALA-"_

_Kurisumasu__**!**_

"MERRY MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU! YES YOU-"

With irritation present in his features, Sasuke used his right hand to cover the blonde's mouth while his left one is holding Sakura's right hand.

"Shut the hell up dobe!"

Sakura smiled at the scene and giggled when Sasuke withdraw his hand in disgust.

Apparently, Naruto had licked Sasuke's hand in an attempt to get his hand off his mouth.

And it worked!

"Ack! Teme you taste like shit!"

Naruto said in between his gagging.

"It's not shocking that you know what shit taste like!"

Sasuke snorted and glared at Naruto, wiping his hands at his jacket.

It was winter time; Jack Frost had visited Konoha and covered it with a blanket of snow.

Children of all ages had gone to the park, which they had passed a while ago, to play with the snow or to ice skate on the frozen lake nearby.

Unfortunately, when passing the park, Naruto was screaming at Sasuke, a huge snow ball was accidentally thrown at him.

The snow ball, of course, went inside his big mouth as it was thrown while he was screaming. So he was forced to swallow a large amount of liquid in which the snow ball melted into.

The couple beside him only laughs at his expense.

They, Naruto, Sakura and Sasuke, are currently headed to Shikamaru's place, because Ino, the self proclaimed party Queen, held it there.

Sakura's gaze softened on the bickering boys beside her.

"You guys really are best friends!"

She said with a bright smile on her face, catching both boys off guard.

The two guys blushed at her sudden declaration.

"Uh..ya..um..okay Sakura-chan…"

"Aa."

Sakura only grinned at the two awkward boys beside her.

Naruto abruptly took off, screaming Hinata's name when he saw her purple-ish hair from afar, leaving the couple together.

Sasuke smirked and grabbed Sakura's waist, holding her tighter against him while they continue to walk.

"Sasuke-kun? What do you want for Christmas?"

"Aa. I got everything I need."

Sakura pouted, snuggling closer to him when a sudden gust of wind came by.

"There must be something!"

Sasuke searched his mind for any possible thing that he wants, and then suddenly he smirked.

Sakura looked at him curiously, wondering why he was smirking like that.

"Hm, I finally decided what I want."

Sakura brightened up, smiling widely.

He leaned closer to her ear and whispered, and then he leaned back smirking her reaction.

Her face suddenly became very red, looking at his smirking face.

"A-are you sure?" she stuttered and becoming redder when he nodded.

"Um, okay…"

With that, they continued to walk to Shikamaru's house in peace.

_Kurisumasu__**!**_

"_Um…Sasuke-kun are you sure you really want this?"_

_-smirks-_

"_Yes."_

"_R-really?"_

"_Yup."_

_-deep breath-_

"_O-okay then…"_

_-opens-closes door-_

"_Um…well?"_

_-blushblush-_

_-smirks-_

"_I knew you'll look good in a cat outfit!"_

"_Sasuke…"_

"_Come here kitty! Master wants to play with his cute kitten…"_

_Kurisumasu__**!**_

"_**Ooh Kami!"**_

* * *

Reviews make me write(:

**MERRY ADVANCE CHRISTMAS EVERYONE! :D**


	14. Of pedophilia and porn

**DISCLAIMER APPLIED**

Summary: _"SASUKE UCHIHA IS A PEDOPHILE!"_

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Humor

**CONGRATS TO MIKI-CHANN!! xD**

Haha! She got it already! XD

My name's **A**ngeli**ca **and I'm only 13 going to be 14! [_damn young rite?!_]

Thanks to the others who tried and reviewed! **I EFFING LUV YOU GUYYZ!!**

SO as for your priiize, it's either I include you in a chapter or write a chapter with ur preferences! Choose kays!(:

**Oh and I'll be really be busy for this year, cuz this year is a critical year for me! Cuz of skul!D:**

**So i'll update less D:**

**IM SOOOORRY!! T.T**

* * *

_PEDOBEA__**R**_

"_Sasuke-kun, you're my PEDOBEAR!"_

"_Pedo-what?!"_

"_Pedobear!"_

"_'s that?"_

"_It's a teddy bear that's a pedophile!"_

"…_."_

_-giggles-_

"_I swear idiocy runs in your families' blood."_

"_SASUKE!"_

"_TEME!"_

_PEDOBEA__**R**_

Sasuke is an 18 year old guy.

A hormone filled guy that is having wet dreams on a girl.

A 14 year old girl.

Who's still on puberty stage.

And his best friend's cousin.

He sighed and ran a hand through his dark unruly hair. Just a few moments ago, he told Naruto, his best friend, that he had an attraction to his _little _cousin.

And now Naruto had this really constipated look on his face.

_Ew._

After sometime the blond finally came back to earth just to call Sasuke a:

"PEDOPHIIIIIIILE!!"

With that loud outburst, countless of heads turned to the Uchiha.

Sasuke scowled and glared at him, burning holes on his empty head.

Pointing an accusing finger at him, Naruto shouted catching attention of more passersby.

"SASUKE WATCHED CHILD PORN!!"

A police officer passing by turned his head at Sasuke, narrowing his eyes at the Uchiha.

Sasuke cursed and landed a punch on the blonde's head.

After a cry of agony, Naruto dashed away from the Uchiha, running blindly.

"SASUKE UCHIHA IS A PEDOPHILEEEEE!" Naruto screamed, catching more attention and directing it at Sasuke.

Sasuke hit his forehead before running after the deranged blond.

Naruto screamed the word again, irritating Sasuke even more.

And due to Naruto's uncanny ability to trip over everything, he trip over a small protruding rock at landed directly on his face.

Not noticing the orange and green converse in front of him.

Sasuke caught up, panting and muttering obscenities. He was about to curse but stopped when he saw a pair of emerald green eyes staring at him.

Naruto groaned and looked up, he grinned when he saw his favorite cousin standing in front of him, the same cousin that Sasuke dreams about.

The blond sat up, he crouched to reach his cousin's height so they're about eye level.

"SAKU-CHAN! SASUKE'S A PEDOPHILE AND HE WATCHES CHILD PORN! RUN AWAY BEFORE HE FUC-ACK!"

Sasuke grabbed Naruto's neck, effectively cutting him off and at the same time choking him.

Sakura blinked, it was shocking to see Sasuke's face really red, though she doesn't know whether it's from embarrassment, anger or something else.

"Sasuke, what's a pedophile? And is it true that you watch child porn?"

Sasuke's eyes bulged out, choking on his own saliva, moving his hands from the unconscious blonde's neck and uncharacterisly waving his hands wildly at her face.

Sakura just tilted her head, confused at his actions, while Sasuke is unbelievably getting an erection.

'_How can I get an erection at a time like this?!'_

"Well, aren't you gonna answer my questions?"

Sasuke turned pink and frowned, glaring at Naruto's head.

"Hn. You're too young to know that and no."

Sakura narrowed her eyes at him, offended for being called a kid.

"I'm not a kid! I'm a teenager, you old man!"

Sasuke teasingly smirked at her and called her a baby.

Sakura, who is seriously pissed, kicked Sasuke at his shin.

And she kicked hard.

He crouched down and proceeded to massage his abused shin, unconsciously twisting his face into a weird expression.

Sakura laughed, while Sasuke frown at her and glared at the still unconscious blond.

Sasuke sighed and stood up, wincing when a sudden pain shot through his leg.

He picked Naruto up and slanged him over his broad shoulders.

He was about to walk away when he felt a tug on his shirt. He looked down, only to see Sakura with a tinged of pink in her cheeks.

Sakura tugged harder on Sasuke's shirt, gesturing for him to bend down.

When he did, she grabbed his face and brought his ear to her mouth.

"_I like you!" _she whispered, her face turning red, not noticing that Sasuke's face is turning pink.

Sasuke smiled then brought himself to her ear, blowing at it before whispering something.

By the time he stood back up, Sakura was completely red.

Sasuke left with a smirk on his face, carrying the still unconscious blond.

Sakura was stunned for a few minutes, and then a smile slowly formed on her lips, giggling lightly.

She then walked away with a light bounce on her step, the words Sasuke whispered lingered in her head.

"_I'll wait for you…"_

_PEDOBEA__**R**_

"_Sasuke-kun!"_

_-hug-_

"_Sasuke, something's poking my stomach!"_

_-eyes widen-_

"_Shit! Um…that's just my…uh…flashlight!"_

"_Flashlight?"_

"_Ya, flashlight! For…um…a school project!"_

"_Oh, okay then!"_

_PEDOBEA__**R**_

"_**Sasuke-kun your flashlight is twitching!"**_

* * *

Reviews make me write(:


	15. Of pocketdialing and little cousins

**DISCLAIMER APPLIED**

Summary: _"Apparently during our…ahem…humping, Sasubabes pocket-dialed my house."_

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Humor

This is my prize for Miki-chan!

Once, again CONGRATULATIONS!!

* * *

_DANCEDANC__**E**_

"_So like, what happened to Sasuke?"_

"_That lucky bastard. HE GOT AWAY WITH NO PUNISHMENT!!"_

"_Nothing at all?"_

"_NOTHING!! Just a high five with his bro!"_

"_Oh, okay bye-bye."_

"_What?! MEA COME BACK HERE!"_

_-walk away-_

"_MEA! MEA! YOU'RE SUPPOSE BE LISTENING TO MY RANTS!"_

"_Sorry, nee-chan, I don't wanna end up deaf."_

"_MEAAA!!"_

_DANCEDANC__**E**_

**-Mea**

Hello idiotic non-intellectuals!

I'm Mea Haruno, cousin of the one and only, Sakura Haruno, who is the girlfriend of Sasuke Uchiha.

So that makes me, like very special!

[_Because, hello! This is Sasuke Uchiha we're talking about here!_]

Anyways, right now I'm in Sakura-nee-chan's [_blindingly pink_] bedroom, listening to her ranting about stupid stuff.

"OH MY GOD! I CAN'T BELIEVE TOU-SAN GROUNDED ME FO-"

I have been 'listening' to her for an hour now.

An hour of illogical ramblings.

I feel bad for my ears, it can only take so much abuse before it goes boom!

Speaking of booms, I haven't seen Deidara for a while, maybe I should visit him next we-

"MEA HARUNO ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO MEEEE?!!"

"Yes, nee-chan I am."

I lowered my head, staring at my rainbow painted toe-nails [_which pwns her boring orange ones_] when she suddenly flicked my forehead with her [_monster sharp_] nails!

Ugh, there's probably gonna be some weird shape on my forehead.

She's probably just jealous 'cuz I got a normal size forehead, unlike hers which is HUGE!!

Like an elephants behind!

Ha!

**-Mea**

"Anyways, Mea darling, I shall tell you the story, why my awesome self is stuck in this equally awesome room of mine, which does not make it as awesome as before 'cuz it is keeping my awesome self captive!"

Sakura grinned brightly, while Mea was preparing herself for the long, long hours to come.

"Please, nee-chan enlighten me."

Mea's words were drenched with heavy sarcasm, in which Sakura ignored and continued to her 'awesome' story.

**-Sakura**

It was in January, Sasuke-kun and me went dancing in this club called, uh…ponies.

[_'Nee-chan what kind of name is that?!'_

'_Shaddup I'm not the one who named it!'_]

And oddly enough it's decorated by pictures of intoxicated rainbow colored ponies…

[_'The owner must be a fucked up idiot!'_

'_Language!'_]

Anyways, after dancing [_'More like fucking with clothes on.', 'Mea!'_] we both decided to go out for fresh air!

But it was snowing, and we weren't really wearing clothes suited for the cold, so we went inside Sasuke's Bugatti Veyron [_'Wow.', 'Ha! Expect the best for Sasubaby!'_] and sat in the backseat.

And of course, us, being two hormonal teenagers. We made out!

['_Ew, nee-chan.'_

'_Hush, Mea!'_]

So when we were having out hot make out session, we suddenly heard a voice!

Then we realized it was coming from Sasucakes' pants.

[_'COOL! I want a pair of talking pants too!'_

'_Mea baby…SHUT THE HELL UP!'_]

Ahem…anyways, I know that I heard the voice from somewhere, but just couldn't figure it out back then.

So I was like, "Sasuke your pants are talking!"

And his face was like WTF, you know like Naruto's face when he's constipated?

['_Oh, that face…ew.'_

'_Yup, I know babes!']_

Uhuh, suddenly we heard Dad screaming for me to get home.

Apparently during our…ahem…humping, Sasubabes pocket-dialed my house.

Oh, and also it seems that Daddie also heard our…moans.

[_'HAHAHAHAHA!! Oh my gosh nee-chan you're so unlucky!'_]

Then Papa was shouting on and on about Sasuke tainting me!

I was damn offended! And I could tell that Sasuke was too, because he was glaring at his phone.

So while Daddie was ranting, we could hear Mommie giggling in the background, telling Daddie to 'hush and let them make her grandkids', which angered Daddie more.

"SAKURA HARUNO IF YOU DON'T GO HOME RIGHT NOW YOU ARE GROUNDED FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE!" Dad boomed which scared the handsome shit out of Sasuke's hot ass!

[_'Nee-chan you're perverted'_]

I meekly told Tou-chan yes, then Sasuke drove me home.

Sooooo, the end!

**-Sakura**

After finishing her awesome epic, note the sarcasm, story, Sakura did a Gai pose and faced Mea.

Resulting to Mea, laughing like a hyena on laughing gas.

"OH MY GOSH NEE-CHAN!! I CAN'T WAIT TO TELL EVERYONE!!"

"Huh?! What?! MEA YOU CAN'T! WAAIT!"

_DANCEDANC__**E**_

_-kiss-_

"_Wait! Turn off your phone first!"_

"_Why?"_

"_Because, you might pocket-dial my house again!"_

"_Hn."_

_-turn off-_

"_Aa done. Where were we?"_

_-smirk-_

_-kiss/moan-_

"_Sasuke…"_

"_SAKURA HARUNO IS THAT YOU?!"_

"_Oh shit…"_

"_OH MY GOD! We forgot about my phone!"_

"…"

"_SAKURA HARUNO GO HOME RIGHT NOW OR ELSE AND BRING THAT SEX-ADDICT BOYFRIEND OF YOURS"_

_-groan-_

_DANCEDANC__**E**_

"_**Not again…"**_

* * *

**EPIC FAIL...**_I'M SOOOOO SORRY MIKI-CHAAAAN! FORGIVE MEEEEEE!!_

Reviews make me write(:


	16. Of older brothers and girlfriends

**DISCLAIMER APPLIED**

Summary: "You got one hot girl, if you got tired of her, give me!"

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Humor

OOC Sasuke/Itachi

_OMG! Sorry for not updating for a loooong tym!! I got filled with school work DDD: __TO those who are still with me thankyou!! To those who left I'm sorry T.T! _

_Thankyou for all the reviews! You guys rock da toot out of me! __Im sorry this is so suck-ish!_

_**IM RUNNING OUT OF IDEAS PLEASE SHARE ONE TO ME IF YOU HAVE!**_

_im taking requests now :D but I'll be slow at doing it D: I'll try to update every two or three weeks! I promise I wont exceed a month of no updating!_

_But I have a mid-year exam nearing so I won't be updating till then D:_

* * *

_iTACH__**I**_

"_So Sakura, you like cosplay?"_

"_Hai!"_

"_Hm."_

"_Why'd you ask Itachi?"_

"_If I buy you an anime nurse outfit will you be my personal nurse?"_

"_Depends, will there be candy?!"_

"_Yup! A lollipop with white hot see- I mean filling!"_

"_Okies!"_

"_Come on, I'll give you the candy now before Sasuke comes bac-"_

"_ITACHI YOU BASTARD!"_

"_Shit. Too late."_

_iTACH__**I**_

'_Aa…Japan…'_

Itachi Uchiha, the first heir to the million dollar company, sighed as he stared outside the airplane window.

Thinking about his brother, he grinned at the thought of being able to tease him again.

'_He'll be damn pissed if I arrived at his apartment house unexpected…'_

His grin transformed into a soft smirk as he slowly fall asleep.

'_Sigh…'_

-

Hours later, Itachi woke up to find himself already in Japan, landing in a few minutes.

He prepared for the landing and organized his items.

A few minutes later, he was already inside a taxi, going to his darling brother's apartment.

His brother, Sasuke Uchiha, the second heir, is currently 20 yrs' old living in a luxurious penthouse fit for a king.

Realizing that he is already at his destination, he paid the driver and entered the building, he went inside the lift, pressed the highest number and waited.

Within seconds he reached the desired floor.

He walked towards the only door and twisted the knob, only to find that it was unlocked.

'_Hn. Seriously one of these days he'll get robbed.'_

-Sasuke-

Sasuke yawned.

He just woke up; exhausted by the _activities _he and his girlfriend did last night.

He smirked while recollecting about last night. With a sigh, he kissed her on the head and stood up.

He dressed himself with his black silk boxer and proceeded saunter to the kitchen.

Noticing that his jacket fell from the coat rack he made his way towards the rack which was situated beside the front door.

Dazed and with a mind still infested with sleep, he walked towards the rack with the speed of a dying snail, when suddenly the front door opened.

"SASU-CHAAAAAN!!"

Sasuke rubbed his eyes while repeatedly blinked.

There in front of him stood a grinning Itachi with arms wide apart as if expecting a hug.

Itachi raised an eyebrow on his brother's lack of clothing.

He sniffed around, smelling a familiar scent, realizing what it is; he faced his little brother and grinned widely.

"Sasu-chan, this place smelled of sweat and cum!"

Sasuke has a horrified expression on his face, when he processed what his brother had just said.

"Baby brother is all grown up! Mother would be so proud!"

Sasuke glared at Itachi.

"Is it me or are you getting stupider each year?!" Sasuke sneered at his brother, still glaring.

Itachi only gave him a dazzling smile, which made him glare more.

"What the hell are you doing here anyways?"

"Can't an older brother just visit his baby brother without having any reason? You wound me Sasuke!"

"Bullshi-"

"Fine. I'm on a business trip!"

Sasuke snorted and proceeded to go to his kitchen, to make some breakfast.

Sasuke placed three plates at the table, making Itachi raise his brow.

"Sasuke, do you have a guest or do you still have an imaginary friend?"

Itachi questioned his brother, whose face reddened in return.

Sasuke oh-so-quietly mumbled that he's girlfriend stayed over.

"Aww! My baby bro's not gay!"

Itachi then walked over to Sasuke and started pinching his cheeks.

Sasuke swatted his hands away and glared at his brother hard, a blush still noticeable on his cheeks.

But what Itachi said next caught him off guard and made his blush increase tenfold.

"So you had fun last night?"

"What th-I ne-NO! I don't know what you're talking about!"

Sasu spluttered, trying to act like as if he doesn't know what Itachi is talking about, but failed miserably.

Then suddenly, Sakura appeared at the kitchen doorway, dripping wet, only clothed with a short and thin towel.

A blush crept up Itachi's face staring at Sakura's body.

"Sasuke-kun you're running out of shampo-oh…OH!"

Sakura stated, before realizing that they had company.

She turned red and squeak before running back into the bathroom.

Itachi had a big grin on his face and turned around to see Sasuke's blushing one.

"You got one hot girl, if you got tired of her, give me!"

With that he left to go unpack his stuff, leaving Sasuke to process what he had said.

Then a few seconds after, he heard his brother shout.

"ITACHI!"

_iTACH__**I**_

"_Sakura you do know that I'm bigger than your boyfriend?!"_

"_Yup!"_

"_Then?"_

"_I like Sasuke-kun better!"_

"_But you haven't even tried me yet!"_

_-pout-_

"_Well…threesome?"_

_-gasp dramatically-_

"_That's brilliant! I'll go tell otouto!"_

_iTACH__**I**_

"_**DIE YOU ASSHOLE!"**_

* * *

_Review pls? Even though I dont deserve it T.T_


	17. Of technology and Naruto

**DISCLAIMER APPLIED**

Summary: "Look teme, I really don't want a night of '_intimate passion' _with you"

Rating: M

Genre: Romance/Humor

_Meh, It's more like a Sasuke-centric._

_SORRY FOR BEING GONE FOR SOOOO LONG! I studied for my Major exam and i failed my maths D:_

_I hate myself right now DD:_

_Oh and the **yaoi fic ** of sasusaku, I won't post it in this anthology :) I'll post it as a separate story and_

_if I'm up to it, it can be a multi-chaptered story :D_

_P.S. THIS STORY IS LAME N A FAIL FORGIVE ME !_

_I used a lot of fuck :D_

* * *

_Oh-Fc**k**._

"_I hate this phone."_

"_Hey! Don't blame the phone! It's your own fault!"_

"_No. It's the phone's fault"_

"_Who told you to be so excited that you can't see straight and click the wrong contact?"_

"_The phone's fault."_

"_Ugh, seriously."_

"_Phone fault."_

___Oh-Fc_**____****k.**  


"Mmm…"

A huge lump on the bed groaned, shifting slightly. A few seconds later a head poke out, revealing the lump to be Sasuke.

"Ah…it was a dream."

Disappointment can be heard from his voice. His eyes are half-lidded but contains irritation from being woken up from a good dream.

"Fuck, this sucks."

His eyes are staring at the huge tent the dream pitched up. With a sigh, he laid himself back on the bed, recollecting his dream.

**Dream**_(lime, skip if you don't want to read)_

"_Oni-sama…"_

_Sakura was standing a few feet away in front of Sasuke wearing a unusually skimpy middle school uniform, and Sasuke was wearing a high school uniform, sitting on a chair. _

_Acting out his role of 'oni-sama' he beckoned her to him, smirking at her shaken form, either from arousal of fear or maybe both._

"_And what did you do now, hm imouto?"_

_Sakura was now right in front of him, still shaking, awaiting her punishment._

"_I-I…"_

"_You?"_

"_I…fucked my teacher…" she whispered, her head down._

"_Hm? I didn't hear that imouto, speak louder."_

_He pulled her to him, and made her straddle him. Sasuke grabbed her chin and forced her to look at him. _

"_I-I fucked my t-teacher…" she said a little louder this time._

_Sasuke released her chin, he made her kneel, so that her breast would be right above his head and his lower body in between her opened legs._

_((SMACK))_

"_Ah!" Sakura moaned both in pain and pleasure._

_Sasuke unexpectedly spanked her, the action making her wet herself._

"_Didn't oni-sama tell you not to fuck anyone but oni-sama?" Sasuke delivered yet another spank, making her cute ass turn deliciously pink._

"_H-hai!"_

"_Then why did you disobey oni-sama?" _

_Another spank was delivered. Sakura was already dripping wet. Sasuke brought his other hand up and grinded his palm into her flushed hole._

"_AH!" _

"_Why?"_

_Sasuke brought his mouth to her navel, and started licking her smooth and firm belly, he grinded his palm harder._

"_I-ah-was feeling so-ohh-ho-rny!"_

"_Tsk. Such a bad imouto, having these feelings in school."_

_He groaned, his erection turned painfully hard when he felt her grind herself to his palm, feeling her immense heat. He grinned suddenly, as an idea came to his mind._

_He spanked her one last time before making her kneel in front of his throbbing bulge. He unzipped his pants, and his dick sprang up, hard, huge and proudly erected. Sakura only kneeled there and ogled his junk. Unexpectedly he grabbed Sakura; she gasped, and shove his dick inside her mouth. Sakura gagged slightly at the sudden intrusion. Sasuke hissed then groaned at the feeling of her hot, moist mouth enclosed at his painfully throbbing dick. Soon Sakura was sucking, nipping and biting his dick and not once was she gentle which only made Sasuke buck his hips more. _

"_Aa…mnhh-Saku-ra! Imnh…hsk!-comin-!"_

_Sakura only continued to suck him harder, seemingly enjoying it more than him. _

"_Ahh-! Saku-"_

**End Dream**

"Fuck…"

He cursed and grimace feeling sticky with his jizz all over his sheets.

He looked down to see his Sasuke jr. painfully hard.

As he rolled over to his stomach, wincing as he crushed his hard-on: giving him miniscule pleasure, he had thought of a very _naughty _idea.

Immediately he grabbed his cell phone and typed a message.

**To:**

**From: Sasuke U.**

_Hey baby, Im hot and horny right now, just had a wet dream of you. _

_Wanna come over at night? I promise you a night of intimate passion and_

_sex, lots of different kind of sex. I'll be waiting, reply soon ;)_

Satisfied, he quickly scanned his contacts, his mind too lust-filled to think straight he then clicked the contact that _he saw_ as Sakura's name.

He exhaled and inhaled loudly trying to calm his excited body. His mind went wild thinking about all the things they could do when the sun sets. His body shuddered in anticipation but his face never change, as expected of an Uchiha.

He looked back at his phone, holding it in his hand, staring at it, waiting for the vibration that signals to him that she replied back.

Though usually an Uchiha is patient, but a horny Uchiha isn't a patient Uchiha. So Sasuke hastily dialed his girlfriend's number and readied himself to demand why she didn't reply.

"_Sasuke-kun! Why did you call?"_

"Hn. You didn't reply."

"_Huh? What are you talking about? Reply what?"_

At that Sasuke growled.

"Stop feigning innocence. I sent you a message."

"_Sasuke-kun you have sent me a message all day!"_

"I did."

"_You didn't! Ugh, you're delusional right now; I'll call you back when you're sane."_

Sasuke sighed in frustration, and rolled on his back looking at his ceiling.

As he closed his eyes, his alarmed beep. Signaling that it's time to see Naruto at the nearby café for their project.

Standing up he quickly did his necessities and drove off.

-**Café**-

Standing at the door he spotted Naruto sitting awkwardly at a booth. Coolly, he walked there, grabbing all the attention.

As soon as Naruto spotted him, he kept glancing everywhere but Sasuke. Once Sasuke had sat down on the opposite side Naruto tried to burry himself on the cushion.

When Sasuke saw this he frowned, thinking how embarrassing it is to sit with the blonde moron.

"What the fuck are you doing dobe?"

* * *

-**Naruto Uzumaki**

"What the fuck are you doing dobe?"

Teme talked! What should I do? Oh my god, our friendship is at stake here!

If Sakura-chan found out, she'll torture me until I die then poor Hinata-chan would be alone cause I would be at heaven and Jii-chan(1) and Kaa-chan would die of sadness and the sun would lose its light and God would be sad and hole in the Earth would get bigger(2) and emo people would become happy and happy people would become emo andandandand TEME!

Why am I so hot and gorgeous that it turns people into Orochimaru(3)!

Why? Why? Why?

* * *

Sasuke looked at Naruto's slightly hyperventilating form. His face ever so slightly twitched in annoyance.

"Dobe."

He called out but alas Naruto is still in his Lala-land.

"Dobe!"

Again he called but with a louder volume, but it was drowned out by Naruto's loud and vigorous breathing.

"DOBE!"

He accompanied the call with a painful smack on the head. Naruto's head bashed loudly on the table and he amazingly recovered fast.

"WHAT IN THE FUCK'S HELL TEME? IM HAVING MY MOMENT AND YOU BASH ME? I THOUGHT YOUR INTO ME?"

Sasuke was furious, not only did Naruto grab the attention of the people inside the café but also outside plus he called Sasuke gay!

He immediately pulled down Naruto's collar to stop him from embarrassing them some more.

* * *

-**Naruto Uzumaki**

OHMYFUCKINGGOD TEME'S GONNA KISS ME! ACK! I HAVE TO PULL AWAY, MY MANLINESS IS AT STAKE!

* * *

Naruto suddenly pulled away, startling Sasuke and landed on his chair. He put on a serious face and started talking.

* * *

-**Naruto Uzumaki**

It's time to do the deed. This is it, the moment of my life. Teme's face is so red, he must be oven-uh wait no-ova-ov-ov-ove-AH SCREW IT! I'll just get this over with!

Okay, inhale…exhale. This is it.

"Teme…"

I watched his face carefully, he looked bored and is forming a zit on his chin.

I inhaled once more and…

"I'M NOT GAY AND YOU HAVE A ZIT ON YOUR CHIN!"

Exhale! I did it!

Teme's hand move so fast it's like he's flash! He covered his chin and his face turned red. Poor teme, I broke his little heart….IT'S SO HARD TO BE SO HOT!

* * *

-**Sasuke Uchiha**

I am fucking furious! What the fuck is wrong with dobe? He kept embarrassing me, he called me gay twice and shouted that I have a zit on my chin! He's destroying my reputation as the perfect man!

* * *

"What the hell are you talking about you mofo?" Sasuke whispered angrily his hand still covering his chin.

Naruto looked at him apologetically and open his mouth to shout but Sasuke's other hand prevented him to do so.

"You will fucking whisper or I would fucking slaughter you." Sasuke's eyes narrowed on Naruto while Naruto furiously nod his head.

He then let go of his mouth.

"Teme…I'm sorry but I'm 100 percent straight! There's isn't any curved bone in my body! And if Sakura-chan found out then she'll be heartbroken and kill me then the world would be heartbroken and kill everyone then God would be heartbroken and kill the universe then we have to go through the whole animal turn man thing again! I'm sorry teme but I'm not about to risk destroying the whole universe."

Unbelievable to Sasuke, Naruto actually manage to say this with a straight face. Sasuke still confused, raised an eyebrow on Naruto.

Naruto sighed dramatically and looked at Sasuke dead in the eye like an interrogator would.

" You sent me a _this!_"

Naruto whipped out his phone and showed the message that _Sakura_ was suppose to receive.

"Look teme, I really don't want a night of '_intimate passion' _with you, if Hinata-chan ask then-"

Sasuke was taken aback, so that's why Sakura said she didn't received any message!

"but Teme it's you and it would be nasty plus I like boobs! BOOBS! Those sexy round things that yo-"

Sasuke quickly took out his phone and sent the message to Sakura. Adding in an apology for accusing her.

"And pussies! I'm not into dicks teme, cuz it's just if I touch gross any other dick that isn't mine! W-"

Almost immediately Sasuke's phone vibrated and he hastily took it, almost dropping in the process, and read the message.

**To: Sexy boyfriend of mine**

**From: Your even sexier girlfriend**

_Sure thing stud, better prepare yourself ;)_

_Oh and Sasuke-kun? I'm lonely and alone in my house right now_

_care to accompany me? I have whip cream and cherry tomatoes~_

_P.s. You're forgiven ;)_

Sasuke almost wept with joy and immediately rushed out of the café, with a prominent bulge at his groin.

"So teme, that's why we can't be together. We'll destroy the balance of life an-"

"Naruto-kun?"

"Destiny! This is not our fa-Hinata-chan!"

"Naruto-kun what are you doing?"

"I'm lecturing Sasuke-teme here about the ways of life!"

Naruto pointed at the place where Sasuke used to be at, and grinned smugly. Hinata followed his hand and ended up into looking at air.

"Naruto-kun, Sasuke-san isn't here."

"Wait, WHAT? TEME STOOD ME UP! Ugh, stupid teme! Forget him, Hinata-chan let's go eat at the ramen shop I saw it has a lot of fla-"

_Oh-Fc**k**._

_-type-_

_-send-_

"_Hn."_

_-phone vibrate-_

"_Hyuuga? Why would he sms me."_

"_Uchiha. I know I'm hot and a superior to you but I do not wish to spent a 'night full of passion' with you."_

_-twitch-_

_ "What the fuck? Not again!"_

_Oh-Fc**k**._

"_**Fuck technology!"**_

_**

* * *

**_

_Let me know what you think and what I can improve on :D_

(1)- Naruto's Father

(2) The ozone hole :D

(3)-He means turning people into gay :DD


End file.
